We tend to exercise alone - even at their busiest, gyms are populated by solo individuals working out, grunting the odd cheer when a machine becomes free. Sometimes, though, we need advice, and if we're not talking to one another, where do we go? That's where online fitness forums come in - virtual communities dedicated to specific activities. Everyone knows your username, but they don't know a lot else, and this means that all manner of questions can be raised unhindered by self-consciousness. But it's not all motivational. Some people use their cloaks of anonymity to seek online omnipotence. These "keyboard warriors" often have avatars of superheroes or large bodybuilders next to their postings. As with all indirect communications, misunderstandings abound and heated rows often arise, so enlightenment and amusement abound - tempered, of course, by the moderators.
Cycling
Subtitled "The World Is For Riding", this forum provides helpful discussions about cycle routes and fitness, and there are plenty of members keen to help others hack their way through the technical jungle of bespoke machines. Anger tends to revolve around performance-enhancing substances. "I'm just a low-grade rider, so do not race in any events with drug testing, so could try anything I could get my hands on," mused one member recently, to the annoyance of many. Levity is swiftly restored, though, with the thread: "Are all middle-aged couples on slow bike rides really dogging?"
Bodybuilding, strength training etc Muscletalk.co.uk
Newcomers to all aspects of resistance exercise are excellently served, with training routines, diet and supplements all analysed by forum members. Experienced weight trainers will also benefit from the discussion threads. Anabolic steroid use is addressed non-hysterically, with advice swiftly doled out to those who're reckoned to be going awry with their "juicing". Though some members angrily dispute its existence, "roid rage" seems to rear its head on occasion: a recent discussion about what ingredients should go into a homemade protein shake elicited much fury. The moderators quell flame wars, functioning as virtual doormen. From their photos, it would seem that some work the doors in real life, too.
Running
An inclusive community for pavement pounders of all standards, with many members meeting up at races and for training jaunts. The inevitable injuries are frequently addressed and the agonies shared. A sense of the loneliness of long-distance runners is sometimes apparent, witness the, "Single male runners check in here - so we can check you out!" thread. One post runs: "I too am gorgeous, single, and in on a Saturday night. By choice - need to be up at 6am for a long run."
Fell running
Fell Running - run up a mountain then run back down - is an ancient sport. In earlier times, one suspects that races were publicised via pigeons, but here you'll find a forum sorting out car sharing and tips on how to hurtle down slopes without having to confess, "I fell running." "Macc Lad" recently presented one of the sport's dilemmas: "I carry a bit more weight than I should and this contributes to my moobs bouncy [sic] up and down so that I get jogger's nipple. So if I ran topless, it would get rid of this problem. However I'm not going to go topless unless I lose my love handles ..."
Indoor rowing
For what appears to be a limited activity, indoor rowing, or "erging", attracts large numbers to its forum. All bases are covered, from fat loss to preparing for the British Indoor Rowing Championships. Far more than pulling a chain while moving up and down a metal rail is to be found here. At least two marriages have directly resulted, though flame wars are frequent, with the lack of intervening moderators often apparent. One recent altercation culminated with, "I'm sure your wife is a rancid old bag, Harry, although I have a degree of sympathy with her having to put up with you. I'm quite happy to send you my address so you can come down here to try to carry out your threat."
Tai chi, meditation etc
The meditators' toolbox thread is very useful for those who want to shut out the babble of modern life. Conversations about meditational techniques abound - "eyes closed or half closed?" The forum has had spam troubles, though: a thread about tranquil locations for meditating is rudely awakened with "Lesbians Get Messy With Food!" Rarely, members do get vexed. After a photo of Miss World appeared, in connection with a Buddhist-related movie she's to appear in, Fireape responded: "What is this site coming to? You are engendering attachment, which is the opposite of what Buddhism is about!"
Martial arts, boxing etc
A lively boxing and mixed martial arts training forum at the website of Ross Enamait, one of the most highly regarded strength coaches in the world. It's packed with clips of workout routines, just the ticket for those whose own regimes have become stale. Wherever there's talk of fighting, though, there's fighting talk. Enamait, a man who is clearly a bit handy, suggests they "go threadcrapping elsewhere!"
Yoga
Classes and courses are discussed, and there's a palpable generosity towards beginners. "Imagine your breath as the sea, as it washes in and out of the shore," suggested Purple Lotus Flower to a newcomer who was finding difficulty discarding the day's metaphysical detritus. Metta.org.uk is also helpful, though rubbishing of different yoga schools is rife. Some annoyance also followed Ted's response to a query about nude yoga classes, but then again, if you wanted to avoid all puerile comment, you'd never be in an online chatroom in the first place.
