Natassja, Mountain Ash: ‘I had a truly lovely and very enjoyable home birth’

I felt that home birth was the best option for me. I felt my body would be at its best in my home environment feeling safe, calm, and empowered. My midwife was very supportive of my home birth, being a low-risk mother with a positive previous birth in the midwife-led unit in Aberdare, which has since closed.

The only concern was a potential lack of staff to cover my birth. I was told during the later stages of pregnancy that, when the time came, I may well phone up to be told that staff were unavailable, and so I would have to come into Prince Charles hospital in Merthyr Tydfil. There are sadly no birth facilities in my local hospital in Mountain Ash. But a midwife was available and I went on to have a truly lovely and very enjoyable home birth.

The midwife attending me was lovely and respectful. She even stayed to have a cup of tea and a chat after the birth.

During my pregnancy I did not receive much information about birth options and had to make my choice based on my own beliefs, research and feelings. I found the Home Birth Reference site to be very helpful for birth stories, information on home water births and practical preparation.

I realise there are big staffing issues in many places, which currently make this difficult to carry out. But I hope that in the future health organisations will do more to promote home birth. The effect of a traumatic birth in hospital on a woman can be devastating. Equally the effect of a positive birth can be extremely empowering and fulfilling. This is very important to a woman’s wellbeing as she enters new motherhood.

I hope many more women go on to have happy, enjoyable births in the future, in the setting they feel is best, when provided with all the information needed to make an informed and balanced choice.

Anna, Manchester: ‘My GP was shocked that I had been allowed a home birth for a first child’

I was never informed about the option of a home birth. But being a Dutch national I know it is the norm in the Netherlands for women to give birth at home if there are no complications.

At every antenatal appointment at Central Manchester hospital doctors would try and persuade me to have a hospital birth instead. I was asked time and again to reconsider, that pain relief was limited (for instance there is no option for an epidural at home) and that the hospital offered a ‘homelike’ environment which was the safest for me and my baby.

This was particularly difficult for my husband, who became worried about the idea of a home birth. Also friends and family (though obviously not from the Dutch side) struggled to understand my choice and the sentence that I heard most before the birth was ‘ ... but what if something happens ... ’ It was a good job that I was so absolutely convinced.

My decision to have a home birth was made easier by the fact I only lived about 10 minutes away from the hospital, so that in the case of an emergency I could be taken there very quickly. The quality of care was amazing. I had the support of a qualified, experienced midwife and a trainee midwife exclusively looking after me during the birth. The birth of my son Christiaan could not have been better.

Home births seem to have an undeserved stigma. If there are no complications or risks it is an amazing option for both the mother and father. You just can’t get the comforts and freedoms in a hospital, let alone the personal and exclusive care from the midwife. During one of the first checkups with my GP after the birth, she was shocked to hear that I had been allowed a home birth for a first child. With these attitudes, it will be difficult to get more women to choose this as a real alternative to hospital births and this needs to change.

Fran, Glasgow: ‘Home births were not promoted by the antenatal teams’

I had my first baby, Nessa, in Glasgow’s now closed Southern General hospital. The labour was long and it wasn’t an easy experience. So I decided to have a home birth for my second child, Ciaran. Being as relaxed as possible during labour and birth was a priority for me. A home birth, where I knew my caregivers and, more importantly, they knew me and my wishes, was the best way for me to try to achieve this.

The care for my home birth was excellent, much better than for my hospital birth. I saw one dedicated midwife from the home birth team at the recently shut down Victoria Infirmary throughout my pregnancy. She also visited me at home on a number of occasions for appointments. In my previous pregnancy, I regularly waited up to three hours for a routine antenatal hospital appointment. In my experience the resources for my home birth were far superior to those for a hospital birth. It is the best care I have ever received from the NHS.

A lot of a ‘successful’ births can be down to luck, rather than preparation. I did a lot of preparation for my second birth, but I also felt extremely well supported by my caregivers. This helped give me the confidence that I could have a different birth than my previous one.

There was no mention of having a home birth at any early antenatal appointment. My baby was quite big and at my 20-week scan the sonographer even said: ‘I take it you’ll be having a C-section.’ Home births were not promoted in any way by the general antenatal teams. My initial information about home births came from private ‘Positive Birth’ social media groups.

My physical and emotional recovery was far quicker after the birth of my second child. I attribute this to the relaxed circumstances surrounding my baby’s birth and my aftercare.

Amy, Durham: ‘It felt like a very personal service’

I gave birth to my first daughter, Florence, two years ago at Durham University hospital without complications, so this time around my midwife suggested having a home birth. At first I thought it was a ridiculous idea, as I assumed it would be safer in hospital. But after some research and talking to a friend who had a home birth, I became more open to the idea. It helped that we only live 10 minutes from the hospital so I wasn’t worried about something going wrong as we would be able to get there quickly.

When I went into labour, I rang the ward at the hospital and they told me a midwife would ring me. She did and we had a few phone calls before she came over just in time for the birth. I gave birth to my second daughter Hazel in a water pool at home with just my husband and two midwives present. My quality of care was excellent and the Durham midwives were exemplary and very supportive. It felt like a very personal service.

Emily, London: ‘The midwife unit seems a good halfway point between a home birth and a hospital birth’

I like the idea of a home birth but, as this is our first baby, I would like the reassurance of being in close proximity to the hospital delivery suite if baby or I need it. The midwife unit seems to be a good halfway point between a home birth and a hospital birth. I am also very keen to use the birthing pool if possible and these are not available in the hospital delivery suite.

During my first midwife appointment the options were explained to me very well: home birth, hospital birth or midwife-led unit. I was encouraged to ask questions and reassured that I could change my mind at any time. I felt it was enough information at that stage, and subsequent appointments have always provided the opportunity to discuss it again.

Our baby is due in late March and we will be going to the Carmen suite at St George’s hospital in London. One of the main draws of the Carmen suite is that if I change my mind about pain relief or if there are any unforeseen complications, the main hospital labour ward and delivery suite is directly opposite and there is the option to go there at any time. We would have been happy to attend antenatal classes at the hospital, but the timings were not compatible with our work commitments, so we are doing classes with a privately run company called Doctor and Daughter.

Edda, Wolverhampton: ‘The community midwives put their own needs above mine’

I initially chose to have a home birth for my son Douglas but, despite being perfectly healthy, I had resistance all the way through my pregnancy. A midwife told me they were struggling to have enough staff to facilitate a home birth service so I think that’s why.

Around my due date a midwife attempted to diagnose me with gestational diabetes without a consultant, and told me I would be induced two days later. I stood my ground and requested to see a consultant who told me they had never suggested an induction. Another consultant told me I didn’t have gestational diabetes after all.

I went into labour shortly after that but the midwives kept being evasive on the phone and insisting I come into the hospital despite my home birth being booked. Eventually they came over two hours after I called them, despite the hospital only being 15 minutes away. Their delay had caused my baby’s heart rate to slow. I had to be rushed by ambulance to have an emergency ventouse which was incredibly terrifying and painful.

I still feel completely let down by the community midwives. They put their own needs above mine. By contrast the hospital staff at New Cross hospital were very professional and caring. One of the doctors at the hospital ignored the midwife’s demand that a C-section was needed. Because of him I wasn’t operated on needlessly and I’m very grateful.

Lucy, Leeds: ‘I felt empowered to request and decline certain procedures’

I see childbirth as a natural process and wanted this to take place somewhere I felt relaxed and in ownership of the space. It was my first baby, but I felt that I would be much less nervous at home. In the end my baby didn’t rotate enough to deliver naturally.

After 24 hours in labour I was transferred into Leeds General Infirmary for a forceps delivery as my baby got stuck facing sideways. Leeds has a dedicated home birth team who use woman-centred care. They are an absolute asset to the NHS. Because I had read up a lot on what my rights and options were, I felt empowered enough to request and decline certain procedures when they were offered and the midwives were understanding and supportive of me.

I would have liked a water birth at home but in the end had an epidural, forceps and large episiotomy. Were it not for this intervention things could have gone much worse. The home birth team were very encouraging to consider home birth even for first time mums like me. They all had a non-judgmental and positive attitude. Even though I had to transfer into hospital in an ambulance, I got the benefit of labouring at home which made the whole experience better than if I’d been labouring in hospital for that long.

Sara, London: ‘I am insisting that things be done my way’

I’m expecting my second baby in early March this year. Having had an emergency caesarean section with my first child, Henry, at St Thomas’ hospital, I have been given careful guidance on options for this birth. I insisted on this after the trauma of my first one. Midwives and doctors have been excellent in providing this guidance this time around.

However, I strongly feel that in the run-up to and during my first birth I was simply left to see what happened. This ended up leading to a prolonged, uncomfortable, stressful and less-than-ideal birth. Due to the likely large size of baby number two, and to avoid a similar scenario to my first birth, I am opting for an elective C-section for this one.

The mental healing process has been long for me, hence a nearly five-year gap between my children. I feel that many women are not listened to in the run-up to giving birth and certainly not during it. Emotional and mental aftercare, especially for more difficult births, is severely lacking. That can play a very important role in the overall healing process.

I think the care is better this time around because both my carers and I are using the knowledge learned from my first delivery to prepare better. Having a thorough debrief with consultants about the problems of my first delivery has allowed us to really think through things and plan for more eventualities.

I have wanted more control over this pregnancy, so I am insisting that things be done my way which, as a first-time mother, you simply don’t know you can do.

Kerry, London: ‘We were relieved to have such speedy access to doctors and resuscitation equipment’

My partner Lex gave birth to our son in Homerton hospital on 2 January. We are a gay couple and spent over £18,000 on three cycles of IVF treatment before falling pregnant on the third try. Because Lex is 41 we were advised on numerous occasions that we did not meet the criteria for the midwife-led birth centre or a home birth.

Despite the many references to fathers instead of partners in antenatal classes and hospital literature, we found the NHS to be very supportive of us and received outstanding care throughout. One of the consultant midwives contacted my partner and asked if she wanted to come in to discuss the decision for doctor-led care and explain Lex’s options in detail. Following this she felt much more comfortable and in control.

Lex’s birth plan was followed to the letter. She laboured for about seven hours in the birth pool until, close to delivery, the monitor showed the baby’s heart rate dropping to dangerous levels indicating distress. Midwives helped Lex out of the pool and the doctor attended immediately. They encouraged Lex to deliver naturally but eventually they skilfully delivered the baby with ventouse. In the end we were relieved to have such speedy access to doctors and resuscitation equipment.

Postnatal care was also first class and every member of staff we came across was 100% supportive of us as a couple and as equal parents. We will be forever grateful to all the amazing people who helped bring our beautiful son into the world.